A few years ago, I had crippling anxiety. Some days I couldn’t get out of bed with fear and worry. I had panic attacks and broke out in sweat and tears at the thought of going outside.
I’m fine now. How did I get to this stage? By accident, actually. I tried to “overcome” my anxiety by focusing on my thoughts, tried meditation and considered therapy. But that wasn’t it. What really got me out was Yoga. Ten minutes a day at first.
Once I was better, I could focus on my thoughts. So I did. I also learned a lot about emotions and why my accidental approach got me out of anxiety. If you or someone you know suffers from anxiety, then this post is for you.
Anxiety is…
a combination of fear and worry. Fear is one of the strongest emotions we have. For a good reason because it keeps us safe. Without fear we’d take reckless actions and risk our lives needlessly.
If you weren’t afraid of being run over by a ton of moving metal, you’d cross a highway on foot. If you weren’t afraid of splashing to your death, you’d lean unreasonably far out of a window. And if you weren’t afraid of spending hours in the bathroom, you’d eat that iffy smelling yoghurt.
Fear keeps us safe. But how exactly does it do that?
How fear works
An event happens. By event I mean either a situation in the outside world (you meet a lion), a scary image (horror movie, anyone?) or a frightening thought (“My boss is going to fire me.”). Any one of these events triggers the emotion fear. In less than a second, your amygdala, the part of your brain associated with emotions, sets off a chain reaction in your body.
Neurotransmitters flood your brain and hormones are released into your bloodstream. The result: Your vision narrows. Your other senses are either on full alert, like your hearing (“What was that noise? The lion sneaking up on me?”) or dulled (someone could pull on your arm but you don’t notice because you hyper-concentrate on the “threat” in front of you).
Your focus narrows. It becomes increasingly difficult to think of anything else but the “threat” you are facing. Your creativity is blocked, tanking your problem solving skills.
Your heart rate accelerates and your blood pressure rises. You take faster and shallower breaths to pump more oxygen into your body. Your muscle cells produce energy and your metabolism kicks up a notch. Your body is now primed for the fight or flight response.
Fear is an emotion, meaning it is an unconscious processing of events, meaning this chain reaction is automatic and out of your control. Whenever you feel fear, the amygdala starts this chain reaction in your body.
Neat right?
Pre-historic you
In theory, it’s even better than neat. It’s brilliant! There you are facing a lion and within two seconds you’re ready to run. Or fight if you’re feeling brave, I guess. This reaction has probably saved thousands of our ancestors’ lives so be as grateful as you can for it because the problem isn’t the reaction itself.
Even on a really bad day you wouldn’t meet more than let’s say three lions, tops. Pre-historic you would have the fear reaction three times. There might be a snake or a leopard so let’s say four times on average. You would have felt the fear and if you manaed to survive you’d have felt the relief next. By the end of the day you’d be exhausted.
Why? Because emotions only last for two minutes but the effects of the chain reaction they cause can stay in your body for hours. So if you get another hit of fear before the effects of the first round have left your system, the chemicals accumulate. The second time around your fear is stronger.
By the fourth time you’re heart, lungs and muscles are exhausted from all than pumping, breathing, and metabolising. You’re far more tired than on a fear-free day. Luckily for pre-historic you, you also have to walk home to your cave. On the way, your muscles slowly use up all the energy released by fear. By the time you get home, you collapse onto your animal hide and sleep it off.
Best part, you’d be too tired to worry about the lion.
Modern you – Or: The shit hits the fan
But modern you doesn’t lead that life any more. Modern you rarely meets any lions but has a boss who threatens to fire them on a daily basis. You spend minutes or even hours every day cooped up in a car or squashed up against strangers on public transport.
Modern you is on social media and watches the news. Both use scare tactics to keep you engaged, in the hope that you spend enough time with your feed or their show to be exposed to an ad or two. Some work places deliberately use fear as a motivation. And headlines are deliberately frightening so you click on them.
You’re exposed to scary situations and scary thoughts all day long. Every day, you get 20, 30, maybe even more hits of fear. Your body is awash in chemicals. Your brain gets clogged with the neurotransmitters. And after a while, this is just your new normal.
Our bodies are made to move for hours every single day but you barely make it to exercise classes twice a week. So the chemicals are stuck inside of you. The energy released in your muscles runs rampant. It even goes to your head.
Enter worry
Worry is another coping mechanism we were born with. It’s supposed to help you solve problems. When you are healthy and well, worry takes a couple of minutes. No, really.
There’s a problem. You identify the problem, then you think of possible solutions. You play through scenarios and your reactions. When you’ve come up with a few good ideas, you decide which one’s the most appropriate for you in your situation. Then you go and do that.
But that’s not how you worry, is it? Why not? Oh, you come up with scenarios alright! Each one worse than the other as your heart rate increases. But you can’t see solutions any more.
Why? Because you’re stuffed to the gills with fear chemicals. Because the neurotransmitters have narrowed your focus and vision. Even if the solution is right in front of you, you are now unable to see it. Literally and figuratively.
You’re stuck in constant worry loops fuelled by the restless energy fear released in your body. Frantic thoughts run rampant in your mind.
Um, it get’s worse…
Your brain is insanely brilliant. It adapts. To anything. Including constant anxiety. Your amygdala, the part of your brain that is in charge of triggering emotional responses, is also linked to your memory. When you have an emotional reaction to an event, your amygdala tags that memory with the emotion.
The next time a similar event happens, – notice, I did not write “the same” – the amygdala pulls up that memory and runs the same emotion. Repetition creates habits. Yes, especially in your brain!
Ever been shouted at by your boss? Even if they apologised afterwards, you felt scared or nervous around them. Why? Because you learned to see them as a threat, meaning your amygdala tagged the sight of your boss with fear. So every time you see that person you feel fear and the chain reaction is triggered in your body.
Anxiety is learned and practised
When you suffer from anxiety, what this means is that you practise it on a daily basis. It might have started with mild nervousness about a new event in your life. If anything went wrong, the experience was tagged with fear. The next similar experience triggered fear automatically and off went the chain reaction.
If you didn’t release the energy and took care of yourself that day, you probably got a few more hits of fear. Or if you simply kept thinking about the event, you would have given yourself shots of fear every single time.
After a while, you are so pumped with fear that even an event that would have caused healthy you to be a bit nervous now turns into a full-blown panic attack. That’s how anxiety grows and how it takes over your life.
This process also sets anxiety apart from a phobia. A phobia is a fear of something. Anxiety is fear and worry felt over and over again until it becomes automatic. That’s why you can’t just think and talk your way out of it.
Releasing fear
I used to believe, I could conquer my anxiety by focusing on my feelings. Feelings are the conscious processing of events, meaning the thoughts you consciously think. Therapy in which you talk about your anxiety and meditation practises use this approach.
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with either of these techniques! Please keep doing them!
Just understand that you have to address the emotions component of your anxiety too. What I’m saying is you have to release the results of the chemical chain reactions in your body! If you don’t, if you just focus on the other methods, it’s like trying to get well by climbing Kilimanjaro with your deadweight body in tow.
So how do you do that?
Practise emotional hygiene every single day. The most effective technique for anxiety: Move. Move and move and move! Start small with a ten minute habit first and work your way up but start today. If you can’t move, the next best release technique is tapping.
By all means, focus on your mind too. Practise meditation, go to therapy, work on your mindset. All useful, helpful and valuable techniques. In combination with daily emotional release.
Into the light
Is that what I did? Sort of and by accident. I stumbled on a 30-day Yoga challenge and started with ten minutes every day. Five years later I’m still doing Yoga every single day.
The slow mindful movement released the nervous energy and calmed me down enough so I could go for walks. Since I avoided people, I went into nearby woods, not knowing that walking among trees lowers anxiety levels even more.
Once my mind calmed down, I tried the mindset techniques again. Lo and behold they finally worked! I stopped eating sugar almost a year ago and that was the nail in the coffin of my anxiety.
I used to belief that anxiety was a part of me because I did not understand how the system works. Your emotions are important. They are a part of you. Yes, they are out of your control but how you handle the fallout isn’t. Your base level of fear is completely within your control.
So release that fear. Regularly. Calm down the worry thoughts. Take care of your body. Create new daily habits.
Do I still experience anxiety? Sure. It lasts for about two minutes. I notice it. I feel it and release it. And then I move on with my day. Because my body is in such good shape, even a panic attack no longer overwhelms me. Instead, my brain easily distracts itself and focuses on a different topic.
I am at peace with my anxiety. I’m even glad I had it because it put me on this path of emotions and feelings. While I stumbled out of anxiety, I have learned since why it worked and can share it with others, like you. Because if I could learn to be at peace with my anxiety, so can you.